5 Ways to Overcome Fear

Fear is a powerful emotion.

It tells us when there’s potential danger in a situation and serves to protect us from feeling physical or emotional pain. Fear is evidence of a spiritual, mental or emotional blockage within ourselves. It’s often caused by spending too much time in future thought.

At any given time, our thoughts are either in the past, present, or future. Emotional pain in our past can cause us to run from it and want to live either in the present or the future. Resistance towards the past and the present put us in default in future thought.

We should only enter future thought mindfully: with past thought healed and present thought accepted. When we enter future thought with underlying emotional pain, we assume there will be more emotional pain in the future and get stuck on the worry wheel

The worry wheel might look like:

• “what if I don’t get the job?”

• “what if they’re talking about me?”

• “what if my amazon package never comes?”

Worry means suffering twice.

The most common form of fear is worry, which is to anticipate problems that never end up happening. It’s to create false scenarios in your mind that show you where in life you have insecurites, fears, doubts, or where you feel unsafe.

Its important to note that when we think in worry, we attract more worry thought. And when we feel resistance to things going wrong in our lives, we attract these situations to us.

Sometimes when we feel a fear so strongly, the universe challenges us by presenting us with that exact fear for that is what’s going to evolve our soul at the time.

Its also important to understand that fear, worry and anxiety are not intuition. You cannot feel anxious and receive intuitive messages at the same time. Intuition is calm and quiet while anxiety is loud and shaky. I will talk about the difference between anxiety and intuition more in another post.

There are 5 Steps to Overcome Fear and Worry:

Faith

Have faith that everything is working out for the highest good for all. Believe that all the problems you may face in life already come with solutions.

Trust

Trust that He will guide you to make wise decisions when you face hardships. Trust that God will only give you situations He knows would be important for your soul’s evolutions

Courage

It’s okay to go through hard times. Have the courage that no matter what happens you can get through this.

Preparation

Work backwards with your worry. What could possibly happen? Create a plan to carry out if it happens.

Confidence

Believe in your ability to conquer anything. Believe that you can handle any challenges you may face.

There may always be something to worry about. Things might very well go horrible wrong. Whether we worry or not. So why not choose mindsets that allow for less worry and more peace?

Affirmations

Everything is working out in my favour

I trust in God to guide me.

I make wise decisions for myself.

I lead with love and understanding

I am confident in my ability to overcome.

Bad things can happen and I will survive.

I am a problem-solver

I am open to receiving answers and solutions

I believe I can be brave

I choose to face my problems and trust that I will be okay no matter what.

Ask yourself:

When was the last time something I worried about actually happened?

How did I handle this situation before?

How can I prepare so that I will feel confident to handle this situation if it happens again?

Is my fear really mine or is it something I've been taught to fear?

How can I practise acceptance in uncertain times?

What do I need right now for inner peace?

How can I lead myself to conquer?

What is preventing me from moving forward with confidence?

How can I lead with love?

What can I prayer for to help me through this difficult time?

Click here to download your worry worksheet

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How to Start a Daily Writing Practise

Why write longhand?

Long hand writing is when you write down your thoughts in sentences exactly as they come. It calms your mind by slowing down thought, putting one thought after the other, and providing a way to visualize your thoughts. Using stream of conscious writing allows you to document the continuous flow of thought.

Writing this way is called Writing Therapy. It involves creating a safe space for this continuous thought and then reflecting on it afterwards. When we become more aware of our thoughts we're able to process emotions much easier. We also tap into our higher conscious that knows our highest good.

What do I write about?

Your only limit is you.

There really is no right or wrong way to do writing therapy. The main idea is to get every thought down onto the page which requires a lot of self-permission. You must use the page to free yourself from any thoughts that feel heavy or block your truth.

You can also use the page to clear out the clutter in your mind. We often have an ongoing to do list in the back of our minds. Writing out all the little things we feel we need to remember makes more room in your mind for creative thought.

Developing the strength to see your thoughts without judgement requires strength and bravery. It can be hard to face parts of ourselves that have been hiding under the junk. Its important to know that when it feels hard to write, that’s when you need it most.

Setting Intentions

When we first start a writing practise we want to set intentions. It’s helpful to answer the question “what do I hope to get out of this?”

You can ask for

• Healing: use the page to process emotion and develop love and understanding

• Clarity: ask questions about what you want and what’s important to you

• Dreaming: give space to contemplate what your dream life looks and feels like

• Inner Peace: define what makes you feel whole

• Connection: strengthen your inner relationship

• Guidance: ask for help

• Self-Discovery: learn more about who you are and what you need

• Release: let go of what no longer serves you. Leave it on the page.

• Next Steps: determine what you should be focusing on next

• Awareness: gain a deeper knowing of the self

• Strength: deal with life’s natural hardships

• Courage: instill bravery and overcome fear

• Confidence: practice self belief and self empowerment

• Self-Discipline: talk about your habits and making good choices for your highest good

• Truth: be honest with yourself. Let it all out in private.

• Expansion: learn what is means for your individual souls evolution

• Higher Consciousness: tap into a higher knowing

• Gratitude: write out the people, events, emotions, and gifts you are thankful for

• Affirmative: write out affirmations to invoke positive thought

Goal Setting

After we set our intentions, we want to set some goals.

Length of Time:

You can set a goal around a length of time you want to be writing.

20 minutes a day

This would work if you know you will be able to write continuously for twenty minutes. This means you set your timer and your pen doesn’t stop moving across the page until the time is up. This is great for beginners because it allows you to go inside without going too deep that might cause resistance. You might also want to start at this level and work your way up.

60 minutes a day

This works for those who need more time to think of what to say. Its also easier for long time writers.

Length of Writing:

Or you can set a goal around an amount of writing you get done.

One page:

This is a great starting goal because you know exactly when you’ve hit your goal even if it may take you awhile. You can also start out with a smaller notebook so you have less room to write and then work your way up to a larger notebook.

Three Pages:

This is the gold mine: the ultimate goal. Science has shown that writing this amount can give us clear access to our sub-conscious mind. This amount of writing allows us to really get in there and explore deeper parts of ourselves. It does take time and emotional strength to get to this level and is something you should strive for. Again you can work your way up by changing the size of your notebooks.

Schedule:

Play around with the time of day that you write at and the number of days during the week that you write. When first starting out it’s important to have one or two days off a week.

If you feel like you need more writing you can always change it.

You can also schedule your writing into Types:

Ex. Mondays - write for clarity

Tuesdays - write for awareness

Wednesday - break or free writing

Thursday - writing for brainstorming my dreams

Friday - free thought

Saturday - gratitude journalling

If being flexible around your writing practise works better for you, your goal might look like 1 page of writing 3x a week. If you need more of a structure it might be at the same time everyday for a certain amount of time.

My personal writing goal is 1 page when I wake up on the days I have my mornings to myself. I feel personally that’s what helps me get out all my thoughts, feel clarity about the day, and perform better at work. This usually takes me an hour but I don’t leave my page until I’ve finished so sometimes it takes longer. You could time yourself for 30 minutes a day if that feels better than setting a page limit.

Choosing Your Notebook

When choosing a notebook, think about the size, the feel, the look, and the feelings that ignite inside you when you hold it.

Notebooks are very individual and you should be very thoughtful when choosing one. It must spark a desire within you to write. You will get more out of your writing if it is something you enjoy and feel good about.

Be mindful of whether you want to change the size of your notebooks. You could have a bigger notebook that you write in once a week, and a smaller notebook you use throughout the week.

My recommendation would to be to start small and work your way up and be mindful of how each writing session makes you feel. Have fun and be flexible about it. Writing blocks are common and you will learn how to navigate through them by returning to the page as much as possible.

Practise Non-judgement and Limit Expectations

Your writing practice is entirely up to you. All that matters is that you write even when it gets hard. When you feel a resistance to writing, it's because there is an emotion or topic you’re avoiding. When this happens, talk about why you don’t want to talk about it. Talk about how uncomfortable it feels to think that you have to venture that deep. You can talk about how you’re not ready for healing or that you’re not yet sure how to handle this emotion.

A note on Quality:

You do not have to be a good writer. Writing Therapy is not about grammar or sentence structure or poetry. It’s about removing censorship from your mind and allowing yourself to be as you are. Anything goes. Practise acceptance as you move through unfamiliar emotion.

Your writing practice is your way of talking to yourself. It’s important to remember that whatever we write is perfectly acceptable. We want to make sure that we make writing a safe space for our thoughts and feelings. Thoughts like “ugh I shouldn’t have wrote that” often translates to “I shouldn’t be feeling that.” We want to practice radical acceptance as we move forward on our path to healing.

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How to Love Yourself Even When It Feels Impossible

It feels like everyone is talking about self-love like it's so easy. What do we do when it feels really hard? Why does it feel like it's harder than it's supposed to be? Although self-love is an individual experience, what if we were more mindful of how we approach self-love?

Most of the time when we think of self love we think of body image and saying "I love you" 3 times in the mirror every morning. But self-love can be much deeper than that.

Some common barriers to self love include:

• Not practising patience and gentleness

• Not allowing myself to be a beginner

• Not allowing myself to fail and make mistakes

Ways to gentle move towards self love include:

• Don’t force it or set unrealistic expectations

• Let go of perfectionism

• Be a leader

We shouldn’t force self-love.

It’s okay to feel like you can't love yourself in this moment. If this resonates with you, the next step would then be to try to fall in love with your potential. When we focus on self-growth it can be easier to express feelings of pride, encouragement and approval. Adapting a growth mindset paves the way towards self-love. Even though you’re not there right now doesn’t mean you’ll never be. You can get there. Give yourself time.

Practising patience with ourselves is an important stepping stone to self-love.

Be patient with your growth. Even if you don’t believe it, you are a work of art and it takes time to create a life that you can feel good about. Knowing that you can get there can provide hope in hard times; a light at the end of the tunnel. Give yourself permission to be a beginner and remain open to learning how to love.

While you walk your path to self-love, I’d like to invite you to ask the question “what if I already do love myself?” There might always be things we would like to change about ourselves as we keep aspiring to be the best we can. A clear sign of self-love is wanting good for yourself. Feeling like you dont have the life you want shows you want yourself to be successful and happy. You want yourself to experience fun, love and light and adventure that comes with life. When we are at war with ourselves, there’s one thing that remains true: we are capable of experiencing better. Even though the life we imagine can feel so distant and out of reach, especially during hard times. To help, we can practise by praying for the highest good and for the gentle evolution of our soul.

You can't hate yourself to the top.

Inside of every one of us is a 3 year old child who wants love. The best way to raise our children to be better people, is not to condemn and judge and ridicule the child. They will more than likely feel defeated, discouraged and misguided. A child will grow with positive reinforcement 10 times out of 10.

Loving yourself means leading yourself to a better life.

As we grow up we realize there comes a point where we turn into our own parents and have to learn to guide our inner child. We have to think about the way we parent and what strategies we can use to guide and teach ourselves. Becoming a leader can help you love yourself because it teaches you to be self-reliant. It’s also a powerful tool we can use to measure our progress. If we’re only working to impress ourselves, then other peoples comments and opinions won’t matter as much.

Being aware of how we feel about ourselves without judging where we are on our path, gives us peace in the moment. From there, it becomes easier to find ways to create a more positive inner relationship. We can then expand to other practices such as building self-esteem, self-worth, self-confidence. Consistent effort is key to forming a healthy relationship with yourself. Practising self-awareness is a skill you'll want to adapt and use throughout your life.

Use the following affirmations to find peace right now:

Even though there are things I don’t like about myself, I still deserve unconditional love, happiness and success.

I am capable of creating and maintaining a life full of joy and love.

I am patient and gentle with myself on this journey.

I understand this is a process and vow to learn how to feel better about myself.

I am doing the best I can with what I know right now.

I pray for the highest good for myself.

I know one day I can feel pure love for myself.

I ask for guidance as I walk the path to self-love and inner peace.

I know happiness is possible for me.

I value the relationship I have with myself.

I am grateful for the opportunity to watch myself bloom.

I am always choosing the best for myself.

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